Regina Cannot Explain It All

doctordisaster:

cordjefferson:

If I was a poor black kid I would first and most importantly work to make sure I got the best grades possible. I would make it my #1 priority to be able to read sufficiently.   I wouldn’t care if I was a student at the worst public middle school in the worst inner city.  Even the worst have their best.  And the very best students, even at the worst schools, have more opportunities.  Getting good grades is the key to having more options.  With good grades you can choose different, better paths.  If you do poorly in school, particularly in a lousy school, you’re severely limiting the limited opportunities you have.  

Forbes’ new column satirizing tone-deaf racist dipshits who don’t know dick about a fucking thing is really funny. Must read.

Amazing and awful in equal measures. (It’s not a parody, by the way.) Apparently the steps to be a successful poor black kid are:

1. Get great grades
2. Get your own computer
3. Piece together your own education from TED talks, wikipedia articles, and Project Gutenberg
4. Go to private school or a public magnet school
5. Make yourself the guidance counselor’s personal project

I’ve had to gloss over some real gems, like ‘use your laptop to connect to a free calculator website, since you can’t afford a calculator’ and ‘private schools will give you a scholarship so they can use your face in brochures,’ but I think this quote says it all:

[T]he biggest challenge we face isn’t inequality. It’s ignorance. So many kids from West Philadelphia don’t even know these opportunities exist for them.

That’s right! The problem is that poor black kids don’t know about the CRAZY NUMBER OF OPPORTUNITIES they have.

Don’t be silly, everyone! I’m sure all of the young poor black kids who read Forbes will find this incredibly useful!

(And I’m sure the 99% of Forbes’ readership will love this covert apologia for their wealth and privilege. #youjustneedtowantitbadenough)